Friday, May 27, 2011

It's Not Always Easy

My experience with fear:

It’s everywhere in our lives. It controls more than you commonly think. Fear of loss. Fear of losing control. Fear of the unknown. Fear of change. Fear of vulnerability..

Part the fascination that I have for climbing is the aspect of fear. Reading The Rock Warrior’s Way hasn’t helped me to get less scared, but helps me understand it better.  I am learning to understand the causes and habits that have come from my seemingly natural reaction to the fear of climbing.

To say that I don’t get terrified while climbing, especially in Yosemite, would be a lie. Yes I am afraid of heights, yes I am afraid of falling, and yes I am severely intimidated by this place.

I sit here, anxiety fills my head, and I doubt my abilities as a climber. Motivation overcomes the hesitancy I have, and as soon as I get into the lead, all of my worries and insecurities drain out. I think clearly and I realize how ridiculous it is that I have such a difficult mental battle to overcome before I start up a route.
I still haven’t been able to figure this out…. I’m working on it.

I’m going to get scared and have some fun tomorrow on the route Lurking Fear on El Capitan, a 21 pitch route rated at 5.13 or 5.7 C2F. 

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